Corporate Whore

http://forum.top-consultant.com/UK/list.aspx?ID=32020


This young chap has found himself on the end of some HR bureaucracy.

I say Deloitte should offer him the job and stop being so petty.

Rejection is a bitch.

You may have little to no knowledge of the organisation, but you begin your research.
Armed with your predetermined answers to the most asked questions, you begin to fill out the application form. You message a couple of friends who may have some valuable nuggets of information that can be added. You want to make this application form shine. Shine so bright your bullshit looks like a reflective silver mirror turd.

You get stuck at the question asking why you applied for the organisation. You spend a couple of hours trawling through their website and other internet resources. It's too late to call HR and slyly ask for some information. You have done so much research and read so many promises of an exciting and challenging career that you have convinced yourself this is the firm that is right for you. You have convinced yourself. This firm is amazing.

One last check of everything. Everything is in order. Save the form. Click. Sent.
Now the waiting game.

Tick. Tock. Tick. Tock. Tick. Tock (repeat a few thousand times)

You check your email and your heart skips a beat. They have replied. This is it. First round interview for sure

....


"
Dear Wanna Be Whore

Thank you for your interest in the position of Corporate Whore with Mitchell Armstrong Pimphouse

....

We have carefully considered your application and are impressed by your qualifications and skills. At this time however, we did not find a good match between our specific needs and your skills and experience. I therefore regret that we will not be proceeding further with your application.

Thank you, once again, for your interest in [us] and we wish you success in your future career.

Kind regards,

Mitchell Armstrong Crackwhore recruitment
"
SHIT



"
Dear Wanna Be Whore,

Thank you for your interest in a position with MegaPimps ...
Unfortunately, after reviewing your materials, we are unable to continue with your application at this time.

...

We wish you the best of luck in your pursuit of employment opportunities.

Regards,

MegaPimps

HR
"
SHIT SHIT

Plenty more emails with similar content creep into your inbox in the following months.

SHIT SHIT SHIT

Rejection is a bitch.